Red Bull Box Cart Thingy

El Yay! What it is? So on Sunday I was able to motivate myself and the rest of the crew to and check out the Red Bull Box Cart Experience thingy-majiggy on Jan Smuts. Well it took a lot of encouragement I'll tell you that to get my ass up off the couch that I had so eloquently cemented my ass upon! Mind you, before you start judging me or any such thing just remember that I actually did not sleep from the evening before cause I gets down like that. I tried to sleep but of course some people just dont allow that to happen when they are around. Granted, I was rather intoxicated and any sleeping would probably induce chunder so I guess it's a tomato-tomatho type situation. So I figured fuck it let's do the damn thing.

...so we got there and DAMN it was quite packed. Yes I know I haven't changed clothes since the day before. So what? Why the judement, it's not like you have never done it before? Ntl!I was well twisted at this stage so everything around me was more or less just one big buzz. Like a giant fly just hanging around my head. If you look closer you'll notice that I look like I'm focusing on something, when in actual fact I'm focusing on nothing at all!! HAHA. If you squint good and proper then you can probably see the starting line for the box carts right up at the top of Jan Smuts. At least I think this was where the top was. I only figured that cause... ...the finish line was down here. DUH! Now I dont know about you but I you were in my shoes then you would be so much more comfortable down here by the finish line than the starting line purely because there was no walking to be done. Besides I dont think my legs would have allowed it. Except maybe to get a chow. But that's it. There goes one of those fella's. Wheeeeeee!!!!! It looks like fun but it's not what I imagined. I thought it was going to be all fast and slick and shit and all these guys would be fighting for the number one spot. Instead there was generally only one cart that was good enough to get to the end with the other one either crashing at the begining or not even making it out of the woodworks. Suckers.So anyway we decide to sit down enjoy the scenery... ...and check out the shit via the big screen or whatever. Good idea right? Definately cause... ...when I looked behind me and I see none other than Alberton Massive in the house. HAHAHAHA!!!! Check him out, he's even got the whole entourage thing down. Classic. I wonder if this is how they roll in Alberton. I know they do in Bloem. How's about a close up, go on... ...look at him! I woulnt be surprised if his name was Bokjol van Heerden or sumthin. LOL! But for real though, guys like this used to make me shit my pants as a kid. SEERIUS! Liv-Luv and Geezy were just as crunk as I was. Actually they could have been even more crunk though. Yes, it quite possibly could have been so. So all of a sudden the Geezy pulls out the corny poses with the quickness! Remember the Pace Magazine Poses from a coupla months back? He saw the pics and figured we didnt't know how to pull out the poses for real so he came out with a vengance to show us all its done. Ths is the classis "holding-a-leaf" pose. If you black then you know all about this shit yo! Think you can bring it huh bitch? Shit you aint got nothing on this beeyatch!!!! HAHA!Okay maybe you do. HAHAHAHA!! Cat looks like he be straight out of Gugulethu or Langa! Okay Geezy, now you're just trying to embarass the rest of us with your almighty poses innit?? It's got that Velaphi/Chuck Norris vibe going on to it doesnt it? Geezy was by far the most entertaining guy of the day! No offense to the chap but I mean he kept us all in stiches the whole time while doing his antics and just generally being a menace to the society. I dont know who the guy is but he looks kinda entertained too. There were one of those new Seat cars from Japan or Spain(I think) on show and he calls over a couple of kids walking around to showcase the vehicle. He would say shit like "Aerodynamically suited to fit your Gluteus Maximus" or "Panoramic view of the birds shitting on your roof" and shit like that. Crazy I tell ya. And he also added a bit of a pose to the mix too just to show that he 'knows' what he's talking about. You can't sell a car that you can't pose in can you?
And then next thing you know he's pointing to the right with a look in his eye that I've never seen before. What could it be? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? NO! Its......motherphucken Koos Norris!!! What the Fuck?!?!? HAHAHA! Okay maybe I'm a bit behind in the trends of the world but is this the new fashion? And where exactly is this fashion goin on? Tweespruit? Ah well, you spotted him, strike a pose with the chap sohn! He was a cool guy though, he even had......some bling. Play on playa! I'm sure you're killing the gurls out there innit. Um yeah...you know what they say about women with big ears right? As we were about to bounce I noticed this rather appealing mound of hay on the side and decided to jump into the shit just cause I can. And I was soon followed by the rest. Obviously I wasnt in the pic cause I had to take a pic. Selfish guys wanted all the fun. But yeah, I wouldnt suggest this to anyone else. That hay is fucken hard!!! Geezy was loving it.So we were walking down the road cause we figured that the whole extravaganza wasnt as exciting as I thought it would be. Now if you look right down the road then you'll notice that the whole road is filled with cars who has parked the same way as us. That didnt stop Five-Oh(thats police officers to you son!) from...
...handing out their pink slips to us and all the cars parked on the road. The fuckers! You'd think that because it was an event that they'd be a bit lenient on the public. Nope, no luck with that.
"The biggest racists aren't white against blacks or even any other race against blacks. The biggest racists are blacks against other blacks" - Suave

I dont care who I offend with the above statement, that's my story and I'm sticking to it! Fok Daai Ding!!!! You might recognise these chaps, you might not. They are the reason for my anger. Just let me catch them in the streets, I swear! So we strolling along and I spotted this chap over here. There are many things that I was thinking of saying about the guy but I figure I'll just keep my mouth shut cause he was quite a cool cat. A Gentle Giant so to speak.
Casual strikes a pose with the guy. Remember that song in the movie Shaka:

"We are going, going higher and higher!". This reminds me of it for it some reson.
Liv-Luv was not impressed with the ticket she had just received. Geezy was there for a comforting word or two. But it wasn't that bad though. Just a hundred bucks.As we chilling I spot yet another well dressed chappy who decided to show to the world how unbelievably stylish he was. It's a pity I didnt take a full-bodied pic cause the rest of the outfit was quite a laugh. Actually I lie, it was hilarious! Alas, no such luck...Anyway we ended of the evening with a beer in the sun with some good conversation. Oh and I ended chatting to some girl who claims to be an underwear model. Here's crossing finger's!

Peaces!

Once Again It's On

Holy Crizzap!! What a weekend! I dont even know where to begin. Before I go on I'd just like to give a special shout out to a girl (who I will call Anonymouse )that I met on Saturday. If you can beleive this, I got my first 'groupie' on Saturday. Whoo Hoo!! Okay maybe she's not a groupie but I suppose you could call her a fan. That's so strange. I've only been doing this for what 4 months or so and already there are people who are telling me about the site and how much they enjoy it. Great stuff. She did ask me to make one change though: take more photo's of cute guys. Well uhm yeah....I dont know about that! How am I supposed to know what a cute guy is like? Sheesh! You know I give and I give and I give! What do I get? HAHAHA!! (So Anonymouse - holla the secret code in the comments and let's see if you're for real). Anyway moving along swiftly. I'll just jump straight to what went down on Saturday.

So I got a text from an old primary school friend that they were having a picnic at the Lake. It's a pity that I dont get to hang out with them as much as I do though but I guess that's how the cookie crumbles when we grow up innit? So we saddled up Jay, Twiggle & myself and rolled through.
So we got there and met up with the old folk. This is Jules. Actually I forgot to mention that it was a birthday celebration and it was her birthday. Sidenote: If you think about it, there were so many birthdays over the last month or two which only leads me to beleive that all your parents were boinking around about summer time before ya'lls were born. Irrelevant I know but...jst saying.
This is Nolly on the left with the caramelle skin( and breath smelling like cinnamon!)...
...and her twin sister Sibby. Yeah I know it sounds/looks weird that they dont look alike in the slightest but beleive me they are twins. Weird I know but if you do your research you'll find that it's very possible. Yeah so it was kind of a sausage party Yup....lots and lots of sausage all around! HAHA! Get it? I see about about nine sausages already. LOL!

But there was sufficient rump around. Oh yeah! Look at them buns dawg! Yeah yeah go ahead and call me a perv but I aint making no excuses. You girls do it too. We just dont catch you that's all. You are just much more slick about it that's all.

The fact that it was a sausage party didnt stop me from getting down and dirty all by self. Watch out, this cat can burn a rug or two I tell ya! Actually I'm talking shit, I couldnt dance to save my life. I know what you thinking - a black cat who has no rhythm? Could it be true? No, I said I cant dance I didnt say I have no rhythm - wink wink! LOL!
Chin-chilla in the cutta. Okay you dont understand? Lemme break it down:
Chin-chilla: Chilling
In The Cutta: and Relaxing
See? Simple right?

Ever since I was about 14 years old people have been on my case about how tall I am. To this day I still dont have a witty, sarcastic come back to tell people. Well actually I do but it's kind of corny. So if you had any discrepancies about how tall I actually am then this picture should dispel any misunderstandings. Sure she's the size of a hobbit but you get the point right? Umm....yeah.
Jay had no problem getting into the mood with a smile from ear-to-ear. I couldnt blame her at all either.
It was quite a nice day out.
I just be straight cold lamping, chilling in the cutta keepsin it gangstarr, sipping on my brewskies and talking smack!! Ya heard!
So she thought she could play WTF with me and give a brother a bit of competition. Umm...okay. This is what came up with. I'm not one to talk shit about the way somebody looks so I will say that it wasnt a bad effort until...
...I pulled out the Fucked Up Face with the meanness!! You aint got nothing on me woman! HAHA!
It started getting a bit chilly so we decided to go to the crib and get a bit warmed up and freshened up for the gig goins down later.

We went to the crib go our shit together and even managed to sneek in a nap for an hour or so. Eventually we were on our way to Rocka/Color Bar. Liv-Luv came through for a bit of the boogy-down too.

And what do you know?! The whole crew was in the house and in full effect! Holleration Of The Nation!

Went past the door(which took us like a half hour for some reason) and the place seemed to be quite on and popping.

As Kenny was doing his thing. I guess it took a while for him to get into the swing of things but eventually he came through with that shit that I like. I have my own taste of music that I like to listen to and this is one guy who also seems to have that same taste. Some people love it, some people playa hate it!

Bumped into K there too. Looks like she just got braids done or something. What's with the suprised expression? HAHAH!

Jay continuing where she left off. But I suspect that wasn't any liquor in there. But then again, you never know.

Me and Soulman holding it down with the lizzadies! Yup, it's real in the field gentlemen.

This is Sandy. Another one of our Cape Town crew who moved up to the J-Section from ye' good ol' town. Yeah she's done her fair share of growing since high school days. Yup! That she has.

Dom was also there in full effect

So was TT.

And Sneed and Emkay

So Tumi went on and did his thing. I'm so suprised that this cat hasn't blown up on levels of K'naan or some shit. He's just as talented and he should be doing track with cats from the States or some shit. I would love to see him working with The Roots or Jill Scott or one of them guys. I think it's TOTALLY possible if you ask me. But I only have one beef with the performance. It was WAY too short. Boo! People payed money to see it and that's all you got? Tsk tsk tsk...

But at least it was a good show. This boy's got talent! I forget who his friend is though! Anyway...

Oh and yes, you know that the evening wasnt done without a couple of these bad boys.

OOOOHHH WEEE! Now that's got some kick to it! Look at Twiggle. HAHAHA! Brass Knuckles not your friend?

Brothers in arms beeyatch!

Once again you kept a cat bumping with those beats that I like. I understand that some of ya'll dont feel the beats that much(Heartwarmer) but it's all good, I did so phuck it! Each man to his own.

So the party was still going down and shit but I was dog tired and decided to get my ass outta there...

...and go past the Bimbo's...

...and get a burger or two. So I'm taking a picture of me and Liv-Luv in the spot when all of a sudden this guy rocks up to me with the quickness harrassing me about taking a pic with him. I mean who does that? Really?!?

But he didnt know that I had my own quickness myself with the good old WTF goins on. You a cool cat but you got suckered my man. Hardy Buddy!

HAHA, got you again dude. Dude is actually lucky cause it can actually get a lot worse than this. I could have popped my balls out and B.R.A.I.N.E.D. his ass quick-fast. If you dont know what a braining is then I suggest you check out the flick Waiting with that guy from Van Wilder. Killer movie! Anyway, got our burgers(and a couple of more beers too) and headed home for a bit of rest. But I didn't rest at all!!!! the good times kept rolling.